My Life As A Birthmom......

III I could of never imagined how my life would change in 2007. I became a different person, FOREVER!!
I became pregnant at the ripe age of 42. Never before had I experienced being pregnant so I think I was in denial for the first few months. Weight gain was passed off as over eating. Missed periods were dismissed as early menopause, as I had no other children so I figured by body was just responding as such.
I found out I was pregnant almost 5 1/2 months later.
Here I was hitting middle age with my boyfriend, who was just as shocked as I was. We had been together for 12 years. We had talked about not wanting children. We liked being able to take off on a whim & being that our relationship was new 12 years ago, we thought this was best.We both had not so rosy childhoods & this was yet again a good reason we chose not to have children.
Fast forward to 2007. We decided to choose adoption. Our decision was the absolute most heart wrenching decision we have ever made in our lives. If you are a birthmom you know exactly how it feels to make such a difficult decision.
I can come across people who think that birthmoms "give up" their children without a backwards glance. I want you to know that that is far from the truth.
Hence is the title for my blog. As a birthmom we are looked down upon, when we are found out. We feel proud of our decision but as a society, you don't look fondly at us.
If you passed me on the street tomorrow, you would never know my secret. You may even smile & speak" hello" or say "thank-you" as I hold the door open for you. We as birthmoms are looked down upon just as a women is that comes out of a clinic, which performs abortions... You believe in life...I do too!!! I want to be able to share my story of the wonderful family I placed my son in. I can't!! I am judged as a bad person.. This is why I have to share my secret as a birthmom here......